Search terms make me laugh, although they shouldn’t because if I had a snapshot of things I’ve typed…well, let’s just say the Pot here won’t be calling the Kettle nothin’! I don’t mean ewww or anything (I love the ‘word’ ewww, I’ve learnt it from my youngest, who has a very Aussie version complete with an attractively huge nostril flare), I just mean odd. Crazy. Like: naturally worming chickens. Now, is this supposed to mean there’s a weird breed of chickens I want to learn about that hunt for worms (no), chickens that know how to vacate parasites from their bodies themselves (I wish, but no) or how to worm chickens without chemicals (yes). With this in mind, enjoy the following non-fiction from behind my blog scenes.
“bad housewife” – yeah sure, you’ll find her here…I’m a card carrying bad housewife.
“Book to hold recipies” – always a good idea, and it’s only a search engine – noone is going to check your spelling are they?
“Apricot Betty” – this freaked me out, because I’d never heard of Apricot Betty until finding the old cookbook.
“Nik *********” – Nik, people are looking for you, girl.
“Apricot Brown Betty” – Whoa – really freaked now. Wasn’t this just a joke, James?
“Wear do you look for keys when you lose” – Well, you can try looking for them here, I mean anything could be hidden in this mess, and I lose the ends of my sentences here all the
“Bigbum” – Bugger off! My height sets it off nicely, I thought. That’s what my mum says.
“Cob bread dip australia” – This search term, or variations thereof, brings more people to my blog than any other. Poor things. There are indeed recipes of cob loaf dips: one hot, one cold, same recipe. They had no idea what they were in for.
“Bad housewives in spas” – No, I don’t really like spas, and I’d never want to clean….ohhhh you mean, Bad housewives in…eeeeeewwwwww. Wrong place, buddy.
“Is acreage good?” – Yep! It may be subjective, but I reckon if you are asking, then it’s probably good for you.
“alpacha spit” – Smells bad, avoid like plague, don’t mess with.
“Bad mother stories” – Yeah, you’ll find them here. Just keeping it real.
“How do I know if my chooks have scaly leg?” – Their legs will have thick crusty chalky scales on them. It often looks quite organic, as though it is a weird part of their leg, but that’s because the scaly leg mites create their homes under the chooks skin by mining the actual material from the legs. Ask and I will answer whenever possible.
“Hot mother stories” – Well, once I made this curry and….wait, you mean something really different don’t you? Sorry, you’ve SO come to the wrong place.
“Betty Paige fringe” – Yes. I have one. And it looks much better two weeks after the haircut, thanks for asking.
Anyone else amused by their search terms? Just me? Well, you know what they say….hey, whose keys are these?