My friend James, Speculative Fiction writer and DaDa of the famous Viszla, Dennis tagged me for an ‘Honest Scrap’ meme. I have to admit, I secretly love meme’s..the magazine version of which I cannot flick past e.g. ‘What’s in YOUR handbag, Mrs Jolie Witherspoon?’ So I’m going to enjoy this…possibly far more than you dear reader. Sorry.
The idea is to list 10 honest facts about yourself, and here’s the rub, ‘make it interesting’… Well, it’s interesting to me. And it’s all about me after all. Me, me, me. I, I, I.
1. I have a fear of falling (which is why I don’t like to fly…what is keeping us UP there?), perhaps because I’ ve been nearly 6 foot tall since I was 14 – it’s a long way down. You would think that fear would abate as I’m sadly starting to shrink, but it’s worse than ever. From decades of witnesses commenting on how gracefully I apparently fall, I suspect I actually black out a little on the way down. Every member of my family sings out if there are wet tiles about, because unfortunately I’m also shockingly accident prone. If I’m standing next to you seemingly doing nothing and I suddenly wince or gasp it’s because I’m imagining myself falling. Go figure.
2. I never wanted to marry or have children and I had no experience of babies at all until I had my own. Didn’t like them, didn’t hold them, didn’t want one. I married Simon because it was as important to him as it wasn’t to me. Then one day I went shopping, saw a baby, burst into tears and that was the end of me. Simon eventually had to go get a vasectomy to stop my plans for a fourth. Luckily.
3. I was smacked hard in the head (10 stitches resulting in a bald patch on my crown – fab) with a softball bat when I was 12 and was never the same again. I became more confident, less anxious and less interested in following the consensus. I don’t recommend this form of behaviour modification however. I’ve been very forgetful ever since, which is one of the reasons I write everything down. AHA!
4. Even though SH and the kids recently saved up and bought a PS3, I have no interest or understanding of it. Now, I cannot even turn the television attached to it on. My siblings and I were brought up strictly and were not allowed to play evil video games and I think I missed that tide. I love pinball machines though. Just don’t let me stand next to you while YOU play. I can be very annoying. Shocker.
5. Although I’m completely capable of doing any assortment of cerebral- type jobs, I choose not to accept these roles, ever. OK, that’s vanity disguised as honesty. All I’m saying is I’m smart enough. Possibly not political enough, and that is probably why I prefer physical, repetitive work and keeps me too busy to look at the clock. I want work that fits around my life, not vice-versa.
6. At one point I had a casual job switching a local program to air at a TV station – it was a sweet job: the place was deserted, I popped in at 6.30pm and left at 7.30pm on a Friday night. I did it all through my last pregnancy, and resumed after my daughter was born…sneaking her in so I could nurse her. She spent every Friday night there in her little rocker chair with me until she was a few months old and inadvertantly pulled a few cables out of the rack behind her plunging the national TV station into darkness. Oops. It was seconds people. You probably didn’t even notice.
7. I always thought I could write a book even though it never occurred to me to be a writer until someone recommended it in my thirties. I always enjoyed writing and was good at it, but doing something as a job to my mind is not supposed to be that enjoyable…oh, this is WAY cheaper than therapy!
8. I’m scraping now….I always wanted a horse and I love having one now, but it has taken a year to overcome the guilt that I haven’t ridden him much. I actually think if I stopped injuring myself and making up excuses and started riding him again, we’d probably go quite well because we have become such good buddies. But that thought doesn’t make me want to do more than just hang out with him on the verandah.
9. My mother is still nursing a hurt about a creative non-fiction piece of writing I wrote, in which I called her the Sandwich Queen. As a result I don’t tell her about any of the writing I am doing until it is published – and this hurts her feelings as well. And yet I don’t regret it at all. Anymore.
10. Due to my height, and having short hair most of my life (and don’t forget the bald patch – I won’t…or maybe I will), and being called ‘Al’ (yeah, I know the song) I have been mistaken for a male many, many more times than I care to remember. This has always offended those in my company at those times, way more than it has me. The hips and the arse I got from my children prevents the situation occuring now. Luckily.
Honest Scrap Meme’s rules ask that I now tag seven more to expose themselves and so I tip:
One Little Detail
Em at Itty Bitty Homestead
My neighbour Stace at Piffle, Drivel and Fluff
Voice of the Turtle AND the unwound road…because that would be interesting and fun.
Light, Sweet, Crudes Trish, of course,
and Rhubarb Whine…all because I’m endlessly fascinated with other people’s lives and these are in lieu of having coffee and chatting face to face. If, however you’d rather eat your own socks, I understand. No pressure. Really.
I’m SO going to think of better things I should have written in about an hour or so. Bugger.